Heart Aches

Vivid memories haunt me more
Vaguely fading like a nightmare from the night before
Shadows pursue... Words undo any progress made...
I want to go... I need to stay.
I'm weary now
No more to say...
Pain tomorrow...
Pain today.

Inflicted wounds...
Hurt just festers in my chest
Can no longer discern what's best...
Can't determine what comes next.
Mind in shambles... thoughts in ruins.

I feel cornered, caught and trapped
Heart is wrapped in gauze
--The cause? Another injury of the acutest kind...
The kind that trancends cuts and scrapes...
I try to rest, unravel, unwind...
I try
and yet, as hard as I might...
The more I always seem to find
that, still...

my.

heart.

aches.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YiULD_Ng8o&playnext=1&videos=CZDIy69cohg

...just grieve, Jess...

but know that you're going to be ok...

you're going to get through this... because God is with you...

because God has placed people around you who care... and who love you.

God is good.

God is in control.

God is faithful.

But... It stings, it aches, it hurts so bad...

Then cry... but know: This too shall pass.

James 1:17

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change."

:-)

Thank You, Father. . .

*likes this song*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEzSiwub8Js

Good

Morning

The night is over and gone. . .

: )

Baby Steps

Hmm... Improvement...

But still so much growth needing to occur... but, Lord, without You, I can make no progress... show me how to lean on You --so dependently that I look to You for each step --my next breath, sustained by You... Thank You for never leaving me... for never giving up on me... much growth needing to occur... but, Jesus, You know... You see all --take me by the hand... teach me how to manifest Your heart.

Forever Yours,
~Jess~

Poetry for my Soul

Psalm 18


1I love you, O LORD, my strength.

2The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer,
my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge,
my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

3I call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised,
and I am saved from my enemies.

4 The cords of death encompassed me;
the torrents of destruction assailed me;

5 the cords of Sheol entangled me;
the snares of death confronted me.

6 In my distress I called upon the LORD;
to my God I cried for help.
From his temple he heard my voice,
and my cry to him reached his ears.

Transparent

Heart throbbing...
Tears betray...
Time to put my thoughts away...

It's now dark...
Eyes now hurt...
Craving the company of a reassuring word...

No more time...
Time to rest...
Time to calm my aching chest...

Feeling lonely...
Overwhelmed...
Wanting only to do well...

Ready for sleep...
Early to rise...
Time to close these swollen eyes...

God is good...
HE is near...
Meets me here and dries each tear...

Please stay close by...
I sense my lack...
I can't do this without Your hand...

You are faithful...
You are true...
Let my heart beat just for You...


Good night, Dear Lord...
I rest in You...
Grant me a heart that's faithful too...

: )

Love You,
Always,
~Jess~